Time, Patience, Honesty and Hopea lot of Hope
by Darkshines1984
Summary: Delphine POV, kicking off after the Season 1 finale. Currently only a one shot but may develop into a multi chapter. Let me know if you want me to carry on.
1. Chapter 1

**Time, Patience, Honesty and Hope...a lot of Hope**

**Rating: **_K+_

**Topic: **_Orphan Black_

**Pairing: **_Cosima and Delphine _

**Summary: **_Delphine POV, kicking off after the Season 1 finale._

_I'm Sick Delphine_

The words are repeating in my head again and again as I cling on to Cosima. My head is spinning due to a wave of different emotions that are overtaking me and all my senses. There is a sense of relief that Cosima had accepted my help and had chosen to divulge something personal to me. Perhaps I am not completely out in the cold. However this relief is overshadowed by a foreboding feeling that is tearing away at me. Cosima is patented. Cosima is property. The clones were indeed in danger but unlike I had been led to believe the danger came from the DYAD institute. So Cosima had been right, I was the danger...I just had been too stupid and too trusting to realise it.

Now on top of the danger Cosima faces from the Institute there is the danger she faces from her own body. I am all too aware of the mystery respiratory ailment that has plagued some of the clones; as part of my former role at the DYAD Institute had been to research the condition. I have only been away from the programme for three months but up until I had been reassigned we had made little progress understanding or finding a cure for the condition. We had been at a disadvantage though. They had never allowed us to treat or research a subject directly and we were instead reliant upon multiple test results for various clones.

Cosima pulls back suddenly, removing herself from the embrace and sitting upright like she had been before the admission. The space between us suddenly feels like a void again and I have no idea if reaching out to the brunette would be welcomed or not. I want to hold her again and tell her everything will be alright. I should have said those things just now whilst we were embracing but I had become too lost in thought. Wary of overstepping the mark and causing Cosima to take a step backwards I resist trying to initiate another hug and instead reached out my hand and place it on top of Cosima's. To my relief the brunette allows the contact and even spreads her fingers so I can entwine our hands together. Even this small piece of intimacy touches my heart and soul more than I ever thought possible.

"You have a respiratory disease oui?" I clarify, trying to confirm my suspicions before my head races away with me. Cosima glances sideways at me and nods but her facial expression was blank and unreadable. I know we are on shaky ground right now and in ideal world I'd avoid the topic of my employment until a later date when the emotional wounds I have caused have started to heal. However it is not an ideal world and the topic of Cosima's health requires addressing.

"I...before I was transferred to you...I was working as a researcher at the DYAD" I begin to explain. "I was working on a cure for the condition but as far as I know one hasn't been perfected yet."

The muscles of Cosima's cheek and neck flicker and her hand closes around mine uncomfortably tightly for the briefest of seconds before easing again. It's hard to remain composed but I take a deep breath, suppress the urge to be sick, and try to continue.

"It's not much of a surprise though as we never really had anything con...concrete to study. Everything was...how do you say it? Need to Know? So we never had any real subjects to research. It was a shoot in the dark."

My English isn't perfect at the best of times but I never usually stumbled over my words like this. I think it's because I can feel the tension emanating from Cosima and it is making me nervous.

"Shot in the dark" Cosima corrects me flatly, her face remaining blank.

"Oh" I mumble, trying not to let the brunette's cool tone sting too much. I have no right to hurt but Cosima has every right to hurt and to be suspicious and angry. There was no quick cure for this; only time, patience, honesty and hope. A lot of hope.

"Cosima I was close to something before but the answers just el...eluded me" I press on. "I can help you...if you let me...I can help you. Please let me try?"

My words sounded confused and pitiful even to my own ears. _I can help you_..._let me try_. I can't promise her anything; I am painfully aware of that. I can however move night and day in an attempt to save her though. I have been careful not to burn bridges and if I am smart I can still use DYAD resources and data to help me. That is of course if I haven't been totally transparent to Leekie. I got the impression from Cosima during our argument back in Minnesota that I am a fairly pathetic liar.

"Because you are an Immunologist and you already have your doctorate" Cosima states quietly.

Her words pull me from my reverie and I dare to glance her way. Her words did not contain any kind of question, only a defeated statement. Her eyes however hold a thousand questions that she is holding back. Perhaps she doesn't want to ask them and have to fight it out tonight or perhaps she is torn between needing to know the answers and not wanting to hear them. Either way I am grateful there is no onslaught. Not yet anyway. I know I owe her some explanation though. I have to give her something.

"I have my pHd" I agree; "and yes my name is Delphine Cornier, I work for the DYAD Institute and I was assigned as your monitor when you moved to Minnesota."

I managed to force the words out without looking away from her, hoping that she would be able to look into my eyes and see how sorry I truly am about it all.

"I befriended you and introduced you to the idea of working for the Institute...I did that because I was told too."

Cosima looks at a loss as to where I am going with all of this and in all honesty I have no idea either. The words just keep pouring out. She begins to disengage her hand from mine but I resist and keep my grasp of it.

"Everything else...between us...I did because I wanted to...because I wanted you."

I feel her hand tighten in mine again and she sighs. Her words at the apartment ring through my ears again.

_How can I possibly believe that Delphine? _

Is that what she is thinking again now? What is she feeling? It's so hard to tell when she is trying to keep her face so blank.

"I still do" I add softly. That is why I am here after all. I had stuck to the safe topic of 'science' when I first arrived but I had not followed her across an international border just to prove my employer was a liar. I had followed her because I couldn't bare the thought of losing her.

I turn to look at her again and find that she is gazing back at me. Her eyes are moist and her lip trembles but she isn't quite crying. She wants to believe be, I can tell, but she is terrified of taking a risk on me again. My words have put too much pressure on her for now so I backtrack slightly.

"I'm not asking for..." I trip over my words again. "I know you may never forgive me. All I am asking is that you let me help you. The rest...I just needed you to know."

Her thumb grazes against my hand and she holds my stare but she remains silent. It feels like I am the only one who has spoken in minutes...maybe I am. Now I have stopped and everything has gone quite I truly understand it when people say that the silence is deafening. I thought it was something I had lost in translation but now I realise I just hadn't experienced it prior to this moment. _Please Cosima, speak to me _I silently plea_._

"I'm so tired Delphine" she finally speaks up. It isn't really on topic but I can see in her eyes and demeanour that it is the truth and not a deflection. She needs rest and time to think and reflect on all of this. I can give her that.

"Then you should sleep mon Cherie" I reply before truly thinking through what I am saying.

I have no right to call her that and I worry she will pull away any second. Instead she strokes her thumb against mine again and sighs. Whatever internal battle she is fighting briefly bubbles to the surface as she looks at me with such confusion and yet such affection at the same time that it makes my chest tighten. I have to look down and away from her because I feel utterly ashamed with myself for making her feel this way. She deserves so much better.

She shifts beside me, removing her hand from mine, and I watch her remove her shoes and kick them under the coffee table with our laptops on. Both machines are still open and Cosima's still displays the dreaded patent encoded into her synthetic DNA. On reading it again I feel like throwing it across the room but instead I resort to closing the laptop over so it is out of sight, even if it can never be out of mind.

_Who_ _patents a fucking human being? _

"Delphine" her voice breaks me from my reverie and my rising loathing and self pity at the fact I have been working for those same people. I turn to look at her again and am surprised to find that she has moved closer to me again. Her hand reaches up and touches the side of my face lightly. It feels damp and I wonder for the briefest of moments why her hand is wet before realising that it is in fact my cheek that is wet. Silent tears have fell somewhere in-between my fear of her pulling away and my fear for her future and I'd been too distracted to notice.

I smile weakly and run my hand across my cheeks to roughly dry them. I shouldn't be the one crying and I'm terrified she will view them as crocodile tears...as a ruse. Another glance at her alleviated those tears somewhat as her expression was soft and her hand still lingered against my jaw.

"Stay with me?" she suddenly pleaded, catching me off guard. I hadn't intended on leaving her unless physically forced to but I had expected to have to beg and promise to sleep as far away from her as possible. It was such a relief that I could only nod in response. Then she smiled and my heart fluttered. It wasn't the open mouthed toothy smile I had become accustomed too but then there was little to look so overjoyed about. It was a relieved smile but it still seemed to reach her eyes. I on the other hand was smiling so much it made my muscles ache.

Cosima reaches for the fluffy blanket that had been lying over the back of the sofa. I hadn't really considered sleeping arrangements since arriving at the rather quaint apartment but considering their only seems to be one bed and that was the property of the man we appeared to be staying with we are obviously sleeping were we are currently sat. It was unlikely to make for a comfortable night's sleep with the two of us wedged on there but right now I couldn't care less.

I follow Cosima's lead and kick off my shoes just like she had a minute or so before and watch as the brunette removes her glasses and unties her high pony tail. It seems wise to let her direct us and the Cosima does so by kicking her legs up onto the sofa and drawing my legs up with her. I help her organise the covers over us and Cosima manoeuvres along the sofa so that she is lying on her side pressed tightly into mine, with her head upon my shoulder. It was surprisingly comfortable considering the small amount of space we have to work with and I find myself nestling my head against the top of Cosima's and sighing contentedly. In response Cosima's arm creeps across my stomach and grasps my hand in hers, entwining our fingers together again.

"I'm glad you are here" Cosima mumbles quietly into my chest.

I can't help but smile as those five words pretty much mean everything to me right now. Yes it was going to take time and patience and honesty but all this is giving me plenty of hope.


	2. Chapter 2

**Time, Patience, Honesty and Hope...a lot of Hope**

**Rating: **_K+_

**Topic: **_Orphan Black_

**Pairing: **_Cosima and Delphine _

**Summary: **_Delphine POV, kicking off after the Season 1 finale._

Chapter 2

I awake to a loud grating sound but before I can register what the noise is, I am being dragged unceremoniously off the sofa and away from the warm body beside me. Somehow I manage to find my feet rather than hit the floor but I am still not in complete control of my body as I am dragged a few feet more into the more open space of the kitchen by a Cosima look-a -like. There is a lot of shouting going on around me and it disorientates me even more. The clone who I presume must be Sarah Manniger has now released me but is waving a gun in my face and yelling, the guy who let me in yesterday is stood next to me yelling at her and Cosima is screaming from behind me.

"Where is she?" I finally manage to pick out Sarah's words through the cacophony of noise but I have no idea what or who she is talking about. More than anything I am aware that I am staring down the barrel of her gun and that cannot be a good thing.

She presses the muzzle of the gun into my face threateningly and the shouting continues and suddenly I feel myself being hauled backwards and Cosima is between us shouting angrily over everyone else. I vaguely pick out the words 'get your gun out of my girlfriends face' which on any other day would make me smile.

When Sarah doesn't comply Cosima angrily slaps the weapon out of her hand and then follows through with a swift punch to the face. Her actions seem to silence everyone and the room stills except for her. Cosima lurches forward at Sarah again but I reach out and wrap my arms around her and pull back, pinning her to me.

"No Cosima" I try to say soothingly, "enough now."

I didn't appreciate the wakeup call but something is clearly wrong and fighting will not resolve it. The man that had been shouting at Sarah obviously agrees with me because he moves towards her and put his hand on her shoulder.

"What the hell is going on?" Cosima shouts angrily at the other clone as she tried to struggle out of my grip. I release my hold slightly but keep my hands on her hips, encouraging but not forcing her to stay with me and not brawl.

"They've taken Kira!" Sarah shouts back, "they have taken Kira and Mrs S!"

Cosima instantly stills and I drop my hands from her waist and bring them to my head. It was no wonder the other woman had come flying in like that but I have no answers for her. The stunned silence is ended when the other man, the one whose apartment it is, pulls the door shut firmly.

"Merde" I mutter before realising I have slipped back to my native French. "When did this happen?"

I look to Sarah for answers but she just stares at me, like she is trying to weigh up whether she can trust me. When she remains silent the man with the British accent answers me.

"Two hours ago" he replies, "It seems that when Sarah didn't sign that contract they went to plan B."

It seemed likely to me that they would have snatched Kira regardless but I can no longer pretend to know what Leekie's motives are. I had always believed he wanted to protect the clones but now it's clear he only ever wanted to protect the experiment. Even though the clones where the main part of the experiment it meant two very different things.

"She will still be local" I try use my prior experience with DYAD to extrapolate what they might do. "Leekie can have a passport within the day and move her on a private plane. We probably only have another 20 hours to find her before she ends up in any number of major cities in any one of twenty eight countries. Maybe more."

It seems my logical conclusions have done little to impress Sarah and she steps towards me again. She may look identical, apart from the dreadlocks, to Cosima but she is far more menacing. She stills her aggressive movement when Cosima steps between us again and resorts to glaring rather than whatever physical violence she had briefly planned upon.

"Tell me where she'll be" the brunette growls at me. She obviously doesn't believe that I am not involved and I cannot really blame her. However in this instance I really do have nothing to hide.

"I don't know" I reply honestly "I have never been here before Sarah. I know there is a research lab located somewhere in the city...but Kira...he wouldn't take her anywhere so obvious. There will be bolt holes. Secret places."

"Like that Neolution Club" the man pipes up, taking the focus of me briefly. It is a welcome distraction as I was becoming increasingly uncomfortable under her glare. Cosima reaches back and grasps my hand in hers and I allow the warmth of her palm to wash over me and comfort me.

"She won't be there; Leekie knows I've been there" Sarah answers after some thought.

I rest my forehead against the back of Cosima's shoulder and try to think. My mind if still foggy from the couple of hours sleep we'd managed before the sudden interruption. I'm not a morning person at the best of time but when it is the early hours of the morning after a plane flight and minimal sleep I am barely functioning. I want to be able to offer up something more concrete to help but apart from trying to locate the DYAD lab I have nothing. In all honesty locating the lab will serve more towards helping Cosima than it will in finding Sarah's daughter. On that front I really do have nothing.

"Why should I believe a word you say?" Sarah suddenly speaks up again. "How can I believe that you know nothing about this after you gave my name to Leekie?"

I have been dreading meeting Sarah for this very reason. I had no idea that I was giving Leekie the name of someone who had slipped through his net. I didn't even know there had been clones that had somehow disappeared under the radar. Unfortunately it made little difference whether I had known or not because the result had been destructive. Sarah Manniger may not have been able to stay under the radar forever but I had brought her and therefore her anomalous daughter to the forefront of Leekie's attention maybe weeks or months in advance.

"I don't know" I finally admit, unable to think of anything more practical to say. I have a feeling that if I attempted to apologise right now she would attack me.

"Leave her alone Sarah" Cosima cuts into whatever Sarah's reply was going to be, irking the other clone.

"Oh for god's sake Cos" she exclaims, "I get she's attractive and all..."

Cosima steps forward again and I reach out to stop her but she stills before I even reach her because she bursts into a fit of coughs. To my horror, and apparently everyone else present, the cough is so violent it causes a splatter of blood to splash onto her hand. All I can do is reach out to her and rub her back, trying to comfort her and trying to find some contact to comfort myself.

When she stops I glance up to see the look of surprise on Sarah's face. Cosima hadn't told them. I was the only person who she had confided in.

"What the..." Sarah starts but then stops just as abruptly. The man who we are staying with magic's a handkerchief from somewhere for Cosima to clean the blood off with.

"Thanks Felix" she mumbles in response. Felix. It's the first time I have caught his name and I store it away for future reference. He and his surrounding are a little quirky and odd to me but I get the impression that he is a good person. Cosima seems to like him too.

"Cosima what is going on?" Sarah finally asks. The straight haired clone's demeanour has changed somewhat after Cosima's coughing fit. Her anger has subsided and she just looks deflated and lost. I can't help but feel terrible for her.

"I'm sick" Cosima replies, "like the German."

I had wondered how Cosima seemed so aware of the repertory illness that was now plaguing her but it hadn't crossed my mind that she had been in contact with another sick clone. I remember one of the names on her list sounding German, one of the deceased clones. Some clinking of glasses drags me back to now and I notice that Felix seems to be pouring us all a glass of wine. Alcohol certainly won't wash all our problems away but I'm not about to refuse a drink right now. Not now I know that Cosima's condition is advanced enough for her to be coughing up blood.

"I think I can help her but I need to run tests" I speak up as Felix hands out the glasses of wine. "I need access to the DYAD Institute."

Cosima sits down on the sofa with her glass but Sarah remains standing and downs the contents of her glass in one. Felix is quick to top it up.

"Do you know where the laboratory is?" Sarah asks and I take a large mouthful of my own wine. It's not the best red wine I have ever tasted but it's not bad. I finish the wine in one more mouthful and look at Cosima. The dreadlocked clone hasn't touched her drink yet and seems to be reflecting on the situation. All I want to do is hold her but with Sarah and Felix here I am not sure if it would be welcomed.

"No idea" I admit, "but if I can find it then I may also be able to locate your daughter."

I'm sure I can narrow it down using a phone book. The DYAD Institute owns and has shares in many smaller companies and laboratories, some of whom I know the names of. With a bit of luck the lab in this city may be owned by a name I recognise.

"Can't you just ring up and ask?" Felix cuts into my thoughts.

I turn to look at him and he shrugs, giving up on his now empty glass and taking a swig from the bottle. It was so….simple. Could it really just be that simple?

"Oui…I…I suppose I could try."


End file.
